Regrets

"Hey!"
"Yeah?"
"Nothing."
"What?"
"I love you, good night!"
"Hah! Go to sleep already!"
"You too!"
"In a bit. Night, bui!"
"Sweet dreams!"



She can't help but back read--
Convos from three months and a week.
With her eyes shedding tears,
And a wish that someone would wipe her cheeks.

"Things changed,"
She told herself
"Since when?"
She'd kill for the answer.

"If I held his hand too,
Or hug him back,
Or let him fall asleep in my shoulders,
Would things be the way they were?"

"If I hadn't told him about how my dream guy should be like,
Or my oh-so-perfect crush,
Or even about how unthinkable our relationship could be,
Would I still be this regretful?"

She filled her head with endless questions--
Questions she's been dying to ask him.
And what does she hope for?
Answers that might save her from this sea of sadness.

Wanted: Assurance

Somebody made a promise...

... As usual, that promise came from someone whose existence I treasure a lot, and I'm just waiting for him to break it so I could hate him forever.

Neeehhh, I kid. But there's a voice inside me screaming "He's just a cliffhanger, everything he said was a lie, you'll be left heartbroken eventually."

Well, I sure hope that I'm just overthinking. It kills, I know, but I can't help it! But if we'll look on the brighter note, at least these hopes weren't raised so I won't get disappointed and cry. Yeah.

D'aw, I can't explain why I'm feeling this way. It seems so wrong... so inappropriate! He's inappropriate alright, but this thing that's happening... it's more inappropriate than that. And ugh, I raped the word "inappropriate", I think could go on without using that word for the rest of this post. Heeee.

We've reached the part where I'd end this post without knowing how to. Anyway, whatever. Let's just hope that my little heart won't get shattered soon 'cause I won't be able to take another heartbreak just yet.

15 Addictions

Know that I put the stupidest of stupid things on my blog that's why I'd never regret listing my current 15 addictions. Heeee.

This is a trending topic on Twitter, but I'd rather put it in blog form so it won't ruin my timeline. And yours too!

1. Cosmetics - Lipsticks, most especially! I can't even explain how I started liking those kind of things actually. Mehhh, it's prolly 'cause I need to cover my shiz.
2. Nautical Things - I blame *insert ex's name here* for this. If he didn't go to marine school, then I guess I won't find these things sartorial.
3. Bows - They're cute... and they `girl` me up! I love how they can be either dainty or huge, and still be adorable.
4. America's Next Top Model - Probably the only TV series that I could finish watching a season. Ha!
5. One Direction - Ahhhhh!!! Proud fangirl here! Blame Janice! If she never asked me to 'pirate' 1D's album, then I won't be a convert. Ohhhh, summer and the randomness of my playlist... ♥
6. Blogging - Not getting enough since 2005.
7. Being rewarded with high grades - Seriously, you guys! I never felt how good it was until I reached this age. I'm such a loser, I know!
8. Animal - Prints - Zebra, giraffe, leopard, snake, tiger, and everything in between 'cause they're fierce and fashionable!
9. YMCMB - I guess I don't have to explain. The thug life's mah thaaannnggg.
10. Books - And too bad I've got no money to buy one now. Huuu, I'm being left behind!
11. Milktea - This is actually my first time to join the bandwagon! You can't blame me though, these kind of teas are too sinful to not be sought-after!
12. Cheesecakes - Blueberry's my favorite. Mmmm... something to crave for!
13. NBA - My boyish self is rearing its head! And if you'll ask which team I'm rooting for, I've been with the Lakers since God-knows-they-weren't-this-awesome. Yeah.
14. Fashion - Dressing up has been my thing since I was young. You know that!
15. Love - I need not to expound why. It's just addicting.

Writing Sleepy

I swear, if provoked to the fullest, I might consider the unthinkable. But kidding aside, I think I already do... Or not. Whatever! Just the thought of it makes me want to slash my wrist or shoot myself in the head. Aaaccckkkk. This can't be happening!

I blame my friends for this insanity. I know I got rid of this feeling, but it's starting to rear its misleading face again! Lol, what for? It was never serious anyway. It's all fun and games, feelings are excluded-- or rather, I'm trying to exclude my feelings. I'm weak, I can't do this all by myself. I'm afraid I might fall without knowing it. You know how much I can't afford to have another heartbreak this time... and there you go, I started stroking on my sentences 'cause I know I'll hate myself in the future if I found out that I typed those. Not to mention, it's all I that could think about lately. Ewww, social suicide. I'm hating myself now. I'm not assuming though.

Now how about my dear "yonder-er"? Two weeks had passed since I met him, to where we ran low on sparks I guess. I didn't felt a thing or two and it's a bit questionable. Nehhh, but at least I knew that it's not the real deal. Don't get me wrong though, everything that I wrote back in summer came from the heart. He's the guy, he's perfect. He's all that I wanted. If I'm going to like anyone, it would be him. Oh and, he's the reason why I didn't get any grade lower than 80 during the prelims. He was my inspiration! (Heart, hearts all over)

Let's get this over with. I can't fall and that's final. Why? Because I have to fall for *, not **.

...Yeah, but you can't make your heart feel something it won't. Am I right?