Here's to Our Friendship Gone Endship

Remember when we weren't outbitching each other through Facebook statuses? When we were just happy, not thinking about any competition? Oh, how about that time when neither of us would backstab each other? Uh huh, but do you remember when we're still friends?

Somewhere along the way, something went wrong. The back of my mind is telling me that you were to blame but then again, we have our faults too. It was both our fault. We drifted and no one is to blame. It was our decision, and it was your decision to be someone we never thought you were. It's pretty crazy really, how we went from almost sisters to annoying blisters. Tsk. Gosh, y'all have no idea how I want to slit your throat. Haha, kidding but half-meant.

I've been missing you all, though. All those crazy chikahan moments, our not-so-out-of-town trips, our bonding moments, everything! Nostalgia kicks in everytime I think of it. While I'm pretty sure that we won't go back to what we were anytime now, let's just use this pace to move on and seek inner peace and maybe, in time, get back to being the closest of friends. The friendship was awesome and I sure want to have it back.

Merriam's 18th Birthday Photodump!

A few weeks ago, we attended our friend Merriam's legal party celebration! The theme was vintage and of course, we were expected to arrive in such outfits. The party went as expected too-- it was vintage all over! Her dance number, the setting, the prods, her cake, her outfit, her hair, everything! It was super nice and I wish I had a debut party too! Nevertheless, I enjoyed it and I'm sure everyone else did too. It was a night to remember most especially for the debutante. Belated happy birthday, Yam! I love you, girl! You're one awesome friend and I hope we'll stay the same through the years. ♥

Photos from the photo booth (c) Merriam, party photos (c) Jevie, in room photos (c) Vicky

My only photo with the lovely debutante! Ewww, I look trashy.

Obligatory portrait photo to end this post! xx

Ain't Awry February

Another month went by and I just have to post an update to keep my promise of keeping this alive. *Sighs*

Well, hello there. Love month's about to end and oh, there goes March! Which means school's about to end anytime soon. Do I hear a whooping yay? Oh yes, there goes my jam right there. Oooohhh, delightful music at its finest.

So, what have I been up to?

First off, we had our Midterm exams. I know, I have to do better! I myself am disappointed with this too, ugh. Think positive!

It's my first Valentine's Day with a date! Of course, you know who I was with-- my R! And here's the only VDay-related photo taken that day. At home with the doughnuts he gave me! Yay to diabetayyy!

I actually got involved in a fight with my bestfriends a few days before V Day. I swear, it was the worst week of my life! Good thing though, we were able to settle it on that day and ta-da! United once again.

Finally! Natuloy din after three failed plans. Full Force went to Star City!!! It was helluva day and I love that I spent it very well.

Back to school madness: It's election time once again! A4S took part in the iFamily-- Partido Independiente's group of campaign managers. Oh, and guess what? The partido is all in! Congrats, guys! And here are your happy campaigners from IR-257!

I guess that's it. February's about to end and I'm glad I filled it with good memories. Check! And here goes my most recent photo with blockmates! Weewhoop! Tell me I look less shittier than usual. Ha!

Photos from: Pamela Lalim, HeavenlyShot Photobooth, Krishna Kemchandani, Badet Bolinao, Rhea Susi, Angela Sicangco, Jhonna Seat, and Charmaine Cayaban -- THANKS!

The Full Force Birthday Experience

Here goes my first post for twenty-thirteen! Hey, y'all! How ya doin'? Before we go to the part where I rant about the recent best thing that happened in my life, I think it's obligatory to post a simple greeting like this since I haven't posted anything for a while and we're halfway through the month and... you get me. I'm sort of neglecting my baby bloggie and knowing me, you know that I feel bad every time it happens. Apologies, readers! (If I have one, lol) It's a part of my resolution to be more active but heck, school's draining the energy outta me so I can't manage but I'll try to keep you posted for time to time! Deal?

Anyway, I just turned 18! Hurraaaahhhh! I'm minor no more and... I still look like one? LOL, I kid. But everybody knows that so I won't argue anymore. Hihi. And I guess I had the best birthday surprise a girl could ever ask for. Commencing story in 3...2...1...

...

It's a normal day for everyone and a not-so normal day for me. 15th January 2013, I'm going legal! I didn't expect for anything to happen, except for a few greetings maybe, but not all these swoon-worthy surprises which totally struck me with giddiness, awe, and every synonym you can find. Let me hear your shrieks; eeeehhh!

I went to school on my usual time-- 5 something, and arrive there eventually like, 6 something. I bumped into Jans on my way to school so we just went together. Yeah, they all greeted me, even Chella and Charmaine who just dropped by, and Dhanica, Rhea, Charry, and many others too. All my friends were like "Ano ba meron ngayon?" or "Mayro'n bang may birthday?" yadda yadda. I knew they were kidding but heck, it made me feel bad! They've been doing it for days and when I said they, the boy is included. For cries' sake! I even felt like crying. And t'was the same reason why I didn't expect a lot, really. Sigh. But not until we went out after being dismissed early.

We arrived at the IR square like nothing's gonna happen. My friends and I went down to grab a quick brekky at the canteen and we even came back shortly. I really didn't know that there was a surprise until I set foot back in the IR Square and everybody broke into a song singing "Happy Birthday, Jowi" to me! I was so caught off-guard, I didn't know how to react. All the singing is nice and touching but what's nicer and more touching is when my boy came out in the middle of the song, handing me a bouquet of Ferrero! It was helluva surprise since I told him months ago that ever since, I've been dying to receive one and I didn't know that he was going to give it to me sooner than I thought he will. Eep! I'm guessing everyone's more kilig than I was since all my friends and all the by-passers are smiling and in awe!

That magical moment. ♥

With thy college barkada, minus some Teehee.

And I thought that was it. English class passed and my teacher who has the same birthday was surprise by my classmates too. After which, we then evacuated and moved to our Research Method room wherein we did nothing so I was expecting to have some daldalan sessions with Rhea who was nowhere in sight. I didn't wonder why 'cause I thought I got all my surprises that day so I looked for Ralph instead. He also ditched the class so I sent him an SMS wherein he replied; "I'm having my brekky, see you later!" Yeah and I failed to notice that Charmaine was MIA too. For an hour and 30, I read Paper Towns with the thought that my friends didn't even prepared for my birthday 'cause it came to me that they must have thought that I now have a boy and I no longer need them. D'awww. Little did I know that they will come towards the end of the class and surprise me with cakes! Then, they lead me into the next room and on my seat lies a note (or notes in this case) which has "18 Reasons Why I Love You" written on it. Eeeehhhh! *insert super kilig emoticon here* Too bad I can't supply you with photos, they haven't uploaded yet! But I will update this if ever.

This has been the greatest birthday so far. Thanks, guys! You totally saved me from slashing my wrist. Jk! But really, thanks. I love you all!

Dear Friends Who Whine About Being Forever Alone,

Please, stop that shit. I'm getting tired of it. I'm telling you; you're the only one to blame if you end up as a grumpy old lady. Like, hello! All you ever did was turn down those guys who knocked at your door without giving them a chance to show how gentle of a man they are. Sure they don't fit your standards quite perfectly, but his imperfections might just make you extremely happy. Right?

...

...

Lol, why would I even ask you if I'm right when I know you won't agree with me in the first place. Ugh, fuck standards? No, fuck your standards. You're just as imperfect as them, you should be thankful that they liked you 'cause you're you. You're not as good as you thought you are, I bet you don't know that. I just wish you haven't met the one and pushed him out of your life yet.

Something Special

Weeks had passed since the last time I felt genuinely happy... I wonder what's up with today and that feeling came knocking on my door once again. What?

Nothing seems to be special until we got out of our English class. Speaking of English class, I qualified for the spelling contest! And my cutesy gay teacher told me; "I feel like you're gonna win! You're warm..." and blah blah blah, they're music to my ears! Gaaahhh, I just hope he's right. Crossing my fingers!

We were super slightly obliged to watch the ASEAN debate earlier. And what better way to cut the boring program off by having my "boyfriend" to whisk me away and go tripping with him within the vicinity of Intramuros! Hihi. But that's not my point! The reason why I blogged is because of my emotional investment feels-- my place in Intramuros.

Sadly, I wasn't able to take a share-worthy photo of it. But if I have to picture it then, I'd describe it as a really nice place where you're forced to forget about everything. EVERYTHING. Seriously, you guys! It felt like time warp. Even Narnia! It's like an entirely different world and it's just beyond amazing. Truth be told, but I never appreciated such kind of things. Until now, of course. It's just... asdfghjkl, too wonderful for words. And having to share the moment with a really nice (and sincere) friend added up to its majesty. Ahhhh, now I know where I'll go if ever I'll think about suicide and stuff. Joke, no way!

Ahhh, I don't know... Today was just incredibly great and I feel like blogging it. *obligatory heart*

Ultimate

You just gotta love that sweet, sincere someone who swore that he'll always be there for you. You gotta love him 'cause he's always there to carry your bag, comb your hair, treat you when you're broke, and check if you're okay. He's happy when you're happy, sad when you're sad, and he feels what you feel. He's worried when there's something wrong and he won't leave until you're feeling better. He'll always laugh at your jokes and he's game with whatever you're on. Nonetheless, he'll tell if you're going overboard. He'd never want to put you in trouble 'cause he cares for you beyond much.

When he does, he'll tell you that he misses you. He's fine with being your pseudo-boyfriend, not to mention that while he's at it, he'll even make it feel true. He'll greet you on your "anniversary", hold your hand, hug you, and tell you all sorts of mushy things. And when you're mad at him, don't expect him to say sorry. That's because he won't just say it, he'll show it. With effort! Oh and, he'll make you feel comfortable-- awkward silences are non-existent, even after hearing him say that he loves you, yes.

You just gotta love that sweet, sincere someone whom you may not be romantically attached with, still loves you no matter what.

P.S. This isn't about love, this is about some guy who loves me and I love him back. And we're not even inlove with each other. Haha.

P.P.S. The title's Ultimate because of Lindsay Lohan's movie OST. There's this line that goes "You're the kind of friend who always bends when I'm broken, like remember when you took my heart and put it back together again." Hehez.

P.P.P.S. Yes, we're just friends. With possibilities? Don't know.

Wanted: Assurance

Somebody made a promise...

... As usual, that promise came from someone whose existence I treasure a lot, and I'm just waiting for him to break it so I could hate him forever.

Neeehhh, I kid. But there's a voice inside me screaming "He's just a cliffhanger, everything he said was a lie, you'll be left heartbroken eventually."

Well, I sure hope that I'm just overthinking. It kills, I know, but I can't help it! But if we'll look on the brighter note, at least these hopes weren't raised so I won't get disappointed and cry. Yeah.

D'aw, I can't explain why I'm feeling this way. It seems so wrong... so inappropriate! He's inappropriate alright, but this thing that's happening... it's more inappropriate than that. And ugh, I raped the word "inappropriate", I think could go on without using that word for the rest of this post. Heeee.

We've reached the part where I'd end this post without knowing how to. Anyway, whatever. Let's just hope that my little heart won't get shattered soon 'cause I won't be able to take another heartbreak just yet.

Writing Sleepy

I swear, if provoked to the fullest, I might consider the unthinkable. But kidding aside, I think I already do... Or not. Whatever! Just the thought of it makes me want to slash my wrist or shoot myself in the head. Aaaccckkkk. This can't be happening!

I blame my friends for this insanity. I know I got rid of this feeling, but it's starting to rear its misleading face again! Lol, what for? It was never serious anyway. It's all fun and games, feelings are excluded-- or rather, I'm trying to exclude my feelings. I'm weak, I can't do this all by myself. I'm afraid I might fall without knowing it. You know how much I can't afford to have another heartbreak this time... and there you go, I started stroking on my sentences 'cause I know I'll hate myself in the future if I found out that I typed those. Not to mention, it's all I that could think about lately. Ewww, social suicide. I'm hating myself now. I'm not assuming though.

Now how about my dear "yonder-er"? Two weeks had passed since I met him, to where we ran low on sparks I guess. I didn't felt a thing or two and it's a bit questionable. Nehhh, but at least I knew that it's not the real deal. Don't get me wrong though, everything that I wrote back in summer came from the heart. He's the guy, he's perfect. He's all that I wanted. If I'm going to like anyone, it would be him. Oh and, he's the reason why I didn't get any grade lower than 80 during the prelims. He was my inspiration! (Heart, hearts all over)

Let's get this over with. I can't fall and that's final. Why? Because I have to fall for *, not **.

...Yeah, but you can't make your heart feel something it won't. Am I right?

Women, why you such whiny bitches?

This me and my most uninspired self trying to blog about how swell last night was. 

I miss my guy friends so bad. And when I say "guy friends", I'm talking about  this bunch of straight guys who play basketball together, goes to gym, made fun of each other -- you know, your typical teenage boys who do all sorts of typical teenage things. They're actually tougher and manlier than my college classmates combined!. Heck yeah! And i couldn't find a reason why I'm even friends with them. As far as my memory is concerned, everything started in Sophomore year when we had a group project and we were sorted with these guys. Eventually, the friendship grew 'cause we started hanging out with each other and their other friends. That was actually awesome because it expanded our circle!

Our time for bonding lessened when we entered college. It's like it went from twice (or even 5 times) a month to once in 2 - 3 months... and that made me miss them terribly. So I was just thankful for last night 'cause I had the chance to have fun with them via Twitter! To cut the long story short, let me just tell you that we had fun doing the same ol' stuffs -- MAKING KUYOG A FRIEND FOR COOKIES! And laughing, and making kana... things! It was so hardcore that the mentions increased and we have no more space for our message. Haha! It was hella fun!

A portion of our chika! Heeee. Thank God I have awesome guy friends. They lessen the drama and they make me happy. Oh yeah! *bro fist* Stephen, William, Donne, Phel, Bamp, and Al; THANK YOU. To our other guy friends who seem lost; GO AND OPEN YOUR TWITTER ACCOUNTS 'CAUSE I TERRIBLY MISS YA'LL!

P.S.: I'm not saying that my friends are such bitches, but I just love being with these guys. Plus, my girl friends are as boyish as I am, we're one heck of a happy barkada!

5 of 366

Yay for free days! I seriously would want to thank whoever arranged our block schedule 'cause I definitely needed a breather. Fck yeah breaks, colleges is so stressful!

We have research papers to do, too many to memorize and understand, and blah blah blah, it gets jumbled up in my head. Thank God, I can do manage to do it with my sanity in tact. Whew! And with awesome college friends around, what can go wrong? They never failed to make my college days worth remembering. Awesome foursome, here they are!

Le me and Chella. One girl I could most likely relate to! She's really hilarious and I love having her around. We like the same clothes, stuffs, even boys! Hihi. Now that's why we're friends.

Le me and Jans. My seatmate forever! Lalim and Lim, our surnames almost sounds the same. This friend of thee is one hell of a maldita, if I may say. But she's the craziest, though! And let me prove it by saying that just by saying bleeped words, we all die laughing!

Le me. Le best bitch friend forever, Charmaine! I've been with her ever since God knows when... I think I know when! If my memory serves me right, it was after the GA but we actually had an encounter waaaayyyy before that. And we could relate to a lot to each other! We like the same things, has the same humor, and blah blah blah. We've been shopping together, eating together, BI-ing together... HAHAHA, we do stuffs together and if it goes on, I guess I'll be with her 'til all the semesters end. Ew Charmaine, if you ever had the chance to read this, hear me say "ew I'm so sweet".

If only God will forbid, I want to be with them 'til Senior Year. Why not? Good company, good vibes, good grades -- what more can I ask for? These girls are awesome. I know one day they'll come across this post so lemme just tell y'all that I LOVE YOU, MAH BITCHES! ♥

It's Fearless

10th August 2011. Props making - 3rd day.

The day started great. I couldn't hide my giddiness! It was like the first time since who knows when that I got excited to go to school ever since I started going to college. Yay! Thank God for my new friends - slash - alliances, for they are the reason why I'm motivated to go to school.

The escapade started at 9AM. We actually begged our Math prof to allow us to go out! Good thing he agreed. We wasted no time and effort as we all rushed to Janice's place to get all the props from there cause we left it in the safety of their home, for they live a few blocks away from school so yeah, we walked and ran through the hustle and bustle of Quiapo and I was in my 3-inch heels! Like a boss.

I and Charmaine!

We arrived at school just in time for the program. Series of events happened, but that didn't hinder us from doing a pretty good job. Although, compared to the upperclassmen, ours sucked! But whatever. That's why we're called freshies, right? Eventually, we'll get better and we'll learn how to adapt in the social jungle of  college.

While preparing the bushes

My dear Jevie, our leader

My bitch and I while we carry our props upstairs. Love ya!

First ever class picture!

A scene from our tableau! Florante and Laura  -- Edward and Inna

Vanity kills... BOREDOM! We had photo ops right after, at the lobby of the JPLhall. That was so ridiculous! Some photos were just too whacked, I was laughing so hard!

Embarrassing photo of yours truly!

VICTORIA! HAHAHA!

Your future diplomats

Only half of us are willing to take a photo. Haha! Hello Janice, Michelle and Charmaine!

Much better.

Whoever is that man on the picture, we're sorry we have to make fun of your portrait HAHA!

And another. Hahaha! Alleged family pic, lol!

Off we went to SM Manila to have our late lunch! But it was only I, Charmaine, Jans, Edward, Jevie and Chella who ate at Greenwhich. We shared lots of stories and learned lots of secrets, like we've been friends for the longest time!

The stairs going to the lower ground floor

Yay!

Now you know who's vain! I and Jans. ♥

With the tower coke Edward ordered. Huzzah!

Chella, Jans, Charmaine, Jowi. ♥

August 11, the day reality slapped us hard. Everything was just as complex as before...but the bond remained.   And some people were added to the bunch! How awesome can it get? And you guys have to agree with me; Charmaine, Jans, Chella, Jevie, Jinik, Elisha, Golda, Nicole, LéAnn, Charlene, Inna, Victoria, and the rest!

*HOPING THERE'S A COMPLETE PICTURE OF US*

Yes, I do miss my highschool friends and I keep on missing them everyday, and I have my college friends by my side whenever I feel alone. And here I am, looking forward to everyday. I am happy!

Photos courtesy of Jevilyn Mary Ruiz